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Japanese singles say that they want to get married but they cannot find a good partner. This is becoming a social problem today, and many of them work harder to meet someone to tie the knot. Work…what? Konkatsu! Activity for marriage!

According to the statistics, one out of 2 singles of the age between 30 and 34 is not married. In fact, many of my friends are serious about Konkatsu. Some take cooking classes, matchmaking parties every weekend, and always ask me to introduce someone to them. I have no idea why they have to struggle so much because they are all nice & kawaii girls to me.

Herbivore men may need to be more active to meet women. Some of them are too shy to talk to women. Anyhow Konkatsu-related businesses are growing in Japan thanks to those people. You know most of Japanese people are very shy and so they need someone to conduct the situation for smooth communication with strangers.

Here’s a sample video that introduces a man who takes a lesson “how to make Omiai (blind date) successful” at a Konkatsu agancy.

Konkatsu lessons

cooking lessons (@5,000yen)
styling fee (10,000yen/month)
party (5,500yen)…Usually men have to pay way more than women.

GREEN single’s bar (Konkatsu bar)

Major Konkatsu-matching agents
Onet
Bridal Net
SunMarie
Nozze
zwei

However, some women pay more attention to the requirements to her partner such as how much he earns yearly and they repeat hopping Konkatsu parties one after another to expect next one should be better. Well…it depends, but I think that marriage is give and take. A man and a woman help each other.

I have a friend about 40 years old who joins one or two of the above agencies. She dated several guys but she was so much disappointed to hear they asked her to stay at home, do things around him to support him so he can concentrate on his work. How outdated these guys are! They should stay with their mom forever~!!

Is Konkatsu sort of activity popular in your country, too?

You may have strong image against Japan that it’s a country of Samurai and Harakiri.
Well that’s true if you discuss Japan of hundreds of years ago, but what’s new today?
One of my blog readers used to ask me to write about how Japanese people go dating. But before I write about that, there is something I should mention: something remarkable between men and women today.

Young Japanese men of 20s and 30s today are apparently different from current 40s or 50s were in that age. The uniqueness of Japanese men nowadays is called as “herbivore boy” and has been broadcasted here and there several times, because they are that unique.

As in the title, Japanese men are getting less interested in the things that they used to stick to.
For example, they are no longer interested in:
-hunting for girls,
-working hard not only to support his family but to get promoted to gain good position at his company,
-buying luxurious car or house to show off,
-drinking strong alcohol and staying away from sweets,
-eating well and working out at a gym to build a manly bodyline,
-competitions
and etc.

These are the things men used to think needed to be a man among men.
But young men never care about such things any more. They enjoy what they like, totally free from prejudice, competition, aggressiveness or whatever men used to pay much attention to.

Here’s what herbivore men care for:
-fashion and cosmetics to make them look good
-time they spend with family
-diet to keep a lean body and to save money
-cafe and sweets (These days sweets especially designed for men are available at convenience stores.)
-mild and modest character, just do things as his own pace

“飲む・打つ・買う” (meaning drinking, gambling, flirting with women) is a common way of expressing bad guy in Japan, but herbivore men are way opposite to this. They are no-drinking, no-gambling, and no-sex!

It sounds peaceful when you hear “Herbivore men” but as to the downside of them, it is said that they can accelerate our social problem of low birth rate because they are indifferent to women. To be exact, they are not proactive or aggressive to make an approach to women. They may feel like dating if only they are asked by women. Yes, they are very passive! Moreover, the virtual girls available in the video game such as LovePlus could be better than real ones!! Being indifferent to expensive car or watch damages Japanese economy, too.

On the other hand, however, we can think that herbivore men have settled in that way under decades of Japanese bad economy. Being less offensive might have been the best way to cope with such gloomy economy. Or it could be Japanese women who created herbivore men. Unlike men, Japanese women have become strong. Women enjoy working very hard at the office, drinking well, shopping a lot, and are very aggressive.

TV or book catches trend faster. Otomen or Ojoman introduced herbivore male earlier.

Now I can clearly understand why one of my male colleagues acted like a woman when I was working at the office. He was around mid 30, single. He seemed to spend much time and money for shopping. He liked eating sweets at the office. He liked to talk with girls for sweets, hair care cosmetics, new shops, and etc. He was wondering what to wear to the event while non of other female colleagues didn’t care much about that. He said he wanted to get married someday, but he didn’t seem to be proactive against women. I was not sure if he had a girlfriend then, but he liked to keep doing things at his own pace, which means he didn’t even like his things touched or moved from the right position by his girlfriend when she came to his house. It was over 5 years ago, when I found he was very different from most of other men, but now I feel he was one of the herbivore guys! Herbivore guys are good to have as friends, but I’m not sure if I can fall in love with someone who I don’t sense “male”. (LOL) What do you think? Have you seen herbivore men around you? Or could you be one of them?

	It’s been over one year since Facebook was introduced to Japanese market. But it is apparent that Facebook is not popular at all in Japan, while it is very successful in most of other countries, including the U.S, not to speak of. Here’s Alexa ranking for Japanese top sites and Facebook is off top 20, and even 40 or 50. Why Facebook is not popular in Japan? There are several reasons to be considered. But as a Japanese, I know that how most Japanese people would feel or think against the service, so it’s pretty easy for me to find the answer. First off, there is alreay a social networking site named Mixi in Japan, which is a giant that has alreay occupied the market. (Gree is also popular among mobile phones.) It was a little too late that Facebook entered our market. Japanese people are those who like to do the same things as most of others do. We don’t want to stick out from the crowd. (I’m talking about the general nationality, not mine.) That means, when there are already so many people having accounts at Mixi, then those who don’t would choose to join it to become “majority”. Yes, this is the very word that illustrates our nationality but anyhow we like to belong to majority, rather than to try something new that no one has been doing. (In that way I know I am minority who chose to blog outside Japan in foreign language. )

But the real problem about Facebook to most of Japanese people is that we have to register with real name! (This is ironically quite opposite to the natural goodness about Facebook that is emphasized.) You may think, so what? What’s wrong with that? But here exists a big cultural difference and this is something particular among Japanese people. We would blog with nickname or panname, and normally we would not reveal real name. We would hide faces even when we upload photos on blogs. We would not speak to Youtube, which is why most Youtube videos made by Japanese people have no sound. (I’m talking about individual and personal bloggers. Company bloggers are not that shy, of course they have to promote themselves!) These would sound ridiculous, but it’s so true that you’ll see what I mean if you browse blogs in Japanese, especially when photos are uploaded, the faces are hidden with star mark or something. This being the case, how come Japanese people would be willing to register real name, real address and personal information on Facebook? I doubt. I wouldn’t say this trend is applicable to everyone in Japan, but majority of Japanese people would be like as I mentioned above.

I was surprised at first when I jumped into blogsphere in English because of so much cultural difference! You use real name, your face is on the photo or on Youtube, you speak to mp3 or mp4 and so on… I follow as you do once as I’m here.

So I forget about Japanese way and I started to show myself on Youtube or in photos and share them here in this blog. But as for my nickname “Kirin” which I’ve been using from my previous blog, I am always wondering if I should change this to my real name. There are pros and cos. But I feel weird if I change it to my real name from now on.

Would it be OK going with Kirin?

But these days I receive emails from Facebook users to invite me to join it. Then I would be using my real name and I feel no coherence between this blog and Facebook.

It sounds really strange problem based on cultural difference. As I blog outside Japan, I didn’t have to stick to Japanese unspoken rules but I didn’t really know this difference until I started and read many other blogs by many other bloggers in the world.

What would you think I should do with this? This may give me another reason I don’t have an account at Facebook yet.

How the things in your country? Do people get crazy about certifications and qualifications to get jobs as well? Would you like to try Manga or Anime Kentei, if you like Japanese anime? How about Maid Kentei if you like maid or lolita? For those who like decorations, decoden master may sound a compelling job?